Choosing A Parenting Style

Parenting styles can significantly affect the development of your child. Have you ever thought about choosing a parenting style?

Parenting styles can affect how children feel about themselves, and view the world, and their emotional intelligence, self-confidence, and esteem are all tied to the parenting style with which they were raised.

Research suggests that children will have the healthiest outcome if you walk the thin line between nurturing and controlling them.

We know every kid is unique, likewise parents, and there is no one way to raise kids.

As much as this is true, specific parenting approaches have been identified by experts that are generally beneficial to kids.

They have their pros and cons, but whatever method you choose, it is essential to ensure your chosen approach supports healthy growth and development.

The way you interact with and discipline your kid will significantly influence their life.

Different types of parenting styles

Let’s get you acquainted with the different styles, shall we?

Permissive parenting

Permissive parents are lenient parents. They tend to pass off as friends to their kids, and there tend to be lots of freedom and minimal or no close monitoring.

Things aren’t structured with this style, and you might notice some inconsistency in how problems and consequences are handled.

Permissive parents might ignore their children’s bad behavior to avoid being shut out by their kids. They feel they are keeping the peace.

Children are given everything to prevent a meltdown and are always defended by their parents even when the parents are aware the kids are wrong.

Children raised with this style are most likely to speak freely without fear but they might also develop behavioral problems as they might not exactly have regard for rules and authority.

Authoritarian parenting

People that fall into this category believe their children should not be seen or heard. You want your kids to do things because you have said so.

Negotiation is not an idea that should be thought of, your kids just have to obey and you consider yourself a strict disciplinarian.

With this style, you can pass off as intimidating your children as you show no affection to them. Punishment is the preferred approach instead of discipline and instead of teaching children how to make better choices, the children have to feel sorry for their mistakes.

So, bad grades can attract some level of beating, sometimes threats and intimidation so the child does exactly what the parent wants.

Children here may become good liars to avoid punishment. They tend to become aggressive and hostile. They can also internalize their feeling of being withdrawn, lonely or afraid.

The uninvolved

The uninvolved parents know little or nothing about their children. They are not intentional about parenting and believe the kids will do just alright.

Sometimes, uninvolved parents have no knowledge about a child’s development.

All they think about is work, bills, and home management are more important problems to give their attention to.

Parents here are neglectful but for some, it’s not intentional.

A single parent might be overwhelmed with trying to sort everything else and not necessarily deciding to be uninvolved.

Parents have the feeling of not knowing their kids, they can conveniently meet the needs of their friend’s child.

They have no clue what the interests of their own kids are or are clueless about if their kids got their homework done.

Children raised with this style have self-esteem issues, have a hard time forming lasting relationships and bonds with others, and might develop behavioral problems.

Authoritative parenting

Parents have rules and consequences, but they also value the input of their children. The use of positive disciplinary measures to promote positive behavior.

Rules are usually clear so the child can clearly understand. They try to create a balance between being firm and warm, they acknowledge and validate the feelings intentionally.

Authoritative parents create schedules for babies but always adjust to fit the needs of the little one or say goodnight to their children instead of reading another story to them.

The authoritative parent can set high expectations for their children but also equip them with the necessary tools, resources, and environment to achieve success.

There is usually a lot of dialogue between parents and children, so a child can think 10 pm curfew is too early, and have a conversation with parents so they can arrive at a fair time.

Children raised with this style tend to be good at decision-making and risk evaluations on their own.

Rounding up

There are other parenting styles like attachment, helicopter, and free-range parenting but these four explained above are the styles common to parents.

Parenting is not for the faint-hearted, there are no perfect parents in the world, and raising kids is one hard job but there is always room for improvement.

There is no one great style of parenting for all parents but you can have a blend of two or more styles.

To know what best suits your child, you will need to spend time studying both your personality and that of the child involved and also consider the values you intend to emphasize.

Keep learning, trying, and doing your best to be a good role model to your kids, pay no attention to guilt, shame or embarrassment, as long as your children are safe and getting all they need to thrive. There is no right or wrong way to parent a child. In the end, we all are winging it.

Your child will need a lot of coaching and lots of practice to develop skills that can help them lead a happier, healthier life.

If you have got parenting questions, you can speak with your child’s pediatrician and they can also refer you to a mental health counselor if need be.

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Viv.